Low-life humanoid types, bow down low before the presence of the great Pooch Doggy Dog!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Dr Strangelove Trashes The "Out Of Africa" Strategy


I just spoke with Dr. Strangelove about the "many males, and few females" ratio postulated in the previously posted article.  (He's still living deep in a mine shaft under Washington, D.C.)  Based on genetic evidence, many more males than females took the trek out of Africa.  When told of the evidence, he laughed.  Scorn was in his voice.

"I thought I already explained the proper procedure!"  he said.  "They did it all wrong."  And, he referred me to the minutes from the last above earth conference of our government prior to the detonation of the Doomsday Machine...

"Mr. President, I would not rule out the chance to preserve a nucleus of human specimens. It would be quite easy atthe bottom of  some of our deeper mineshafts. The radioactivity would never penetrate a mine some thousands of feet deep. And in a matter of weeks, sufficient improvements in dwelling space could easily be provided." 
"How long would you have to stay down there?" 
"I would think that uh possibly one hundred years." 
"You mean, people could actually stay down there for a hundred years?" 
"It would not be difficult mein Fuhrer! Nuclear reactors could, heh... I'm sorry. Mr. President. Nuclear reactors could provide power almost indefinitely. Greenhouses could maintain plantlife. Animals could be bred and slaughtered. A quick survey would have to be made of all the available mine sites in the country. But I would guess... that ah, dwelling space for several hundred thousands of our people could easily be provided." 
"Well I... I would hate to have to decide who stays up and who goes down." 
"Well, that would not be necessary Mr. President. It could easily be accomplished with a computer. And a computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross section of necessary skills. Of course it would be absolutely vital that our top government and military men be included to foster and impart the required principles of leadership and tradition. Naturally, they would breed prodigiously, eh? There would be much time, and little to do. But ah with the proper breeding techniques and a ratio of say, ten females to each male, I would guess that they could then work their way back to the present gross national product within say, twenty years." 
        - Dr Strangelove & President Merkin Muffley


So, there we have it.  10 females to every male, optimal...  breed prodigously...

That's the only way that makes sense.  No wonder you humanoids are so screwed up!

Pooch Doggy Dog




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